E5: A Nursery Rhyme for the 119th Congress

Essays for the necessary indoctrination of our children

Jan 27, 2025

An audio version is available here.

A Nursery Rhyme for the 119th Congress

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Would we carry a lock in a sock?

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Would we do it on the clock?

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Would we smear sh-t on the wall?

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Would that I’m a know-it-all.

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Would we do it back at home?

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Would we do it at AutoZone?

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Would we do it at the bank?

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Would we follow plutocrats?

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Would this day that I am freed

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from cult of mediocrity,

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(and balls and chains and dirty deeds).

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Would we be as fierce as this?

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Would we steal valor for a kiss?

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Though He go atop a Throne,

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I am duty-bound to Don alone.

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(I hide my weapons far from town.)

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I am resigned to roam alone

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the godless hallways of my home.

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The dog is gone, and taken the bone.

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(The wife’s let meatloaf out to mold.)

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- M. L.

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ASSIGNMENT: Please submit poetic analysis and related notes to Wikipedia by February 17, President’s Day (U.S. Federal Holiday).

Extra credit—cite literary or historical references to: Green Eggs and Ham. King Lear. Macbeth. Tony Soprano. Judas. Brutus. Apocalypse Now. Zora Neale Hurston. The Coming-of-age genre. Potty humor. Country music. The Insurrection. Voltaire. Greek mythology. W. Saltonstall. Paradise Lost. Bob Dylan. and/or Author, Peter Brian Hegseth.

Double Credit—Is awarded to the first to have this read in to the 119th Congressional Record.

Oh, don’t forget Office Hours are Thursdays, 10 am - 2 pm.

Talk soon!

An audio version is available here.